For crying out loud..

Oh, shut It.

Till about 45 minutes ago, Slumdog Millionaire was the worst thing to have ever hit Indian movie halls according to the very “intelligent masses”. India was appalled at the portrayal of the poor in the city of Mumbai. Danny Boyle was an enemy even bigger than the Mumbai terror attack perpetrators. The movie completely portrayed India in the wrong light. The British were up to their old tricks, weren’t they? Everyone who wanted media space- TV or print was tearing apart the movie completely (ex- IIPM’s pony tailed Arindham Chaudhari). India has been hurt and that it is a disgrace and blah blah.

Now the movie has won the 2009 Oscar for best picture, please do not call it victory for India, or Mera Bharat mahan or chak de India or something similar. Because something which was totally a disgrace for India till about 45 minutes ago cannot suddenly become the glory factor.

So, Shut it.

It is a victory for the entire crew, not the country. They worked hard, did a good job and deserved the award. Not all you for running your mouths just to be on television.

For God Sake, stop being hypocrites.

Loss of a Home.

Last weekend I went to Jaipur. It is like my third home. The first being my actual home where I eat, sleep and have fun. Second being my office, where I eat, sleep and have fun. And the third being Jaipur. Where also I eat, sleep and have fun.

But this time, things seemed different. There seemed an air of change, and a bad one at that. I was not able to put my finger on it, until I got stuck in a traffic jam. A traffic jam in Jaipur till now was like an aircraft carrier in the Ganges river.

But it happened. And it was right then that I figured out what had happened. It was Ashok Gehlot, the new Congress party’s chief minister for the state of Rajasthan. Looking around Jaipur, I saw dug up roads, traffic signals, portholes and more traffic jams. And yes, there is a BRT also in the works. After living in a Congress ruled (or misruled) state- Delhi, for about 10 years now, I can assure you that such chaotic scenes are the trademarks of a state where the Congress party is in power. Off the roads and the elecricity had developed the habit of running away whenever it wanted. And the youngsters at malls and markets had a worried look on their faces, half expecting some moronic Moral Sena (which will have the blessing of Gehlot- the pile of bones made from solidified, but still very smelly s**t .) to jump out from the shadows and assault them.

The chief minister, or the s**t eating, s**t sucking, s**t drinking waste of blood and organs as I call him, has announced that he does not like the sight of any boy holding any other girl’s hand and walking.

First, it is not his job to tell youngsters what to do. He is not the boss of me.

Second, he can eat more s**t.

Third, he can die.

I wonder why the people of Rajasthan voted Congress back into power. Look, I am no supporter of the BJP, but the fact is simple. Vasundhara Raje was doing a brilliant job, was a charismatic leader, had modern and liberal views, and had taken the state to levels of development which will now all be undone within the spaace of 2 months and Jaipur will be transferred back to the camel riding, dusty and utterly rubbish state it was pre-Raje era.

And the people of Rajasthan have to be blamed for voting the assinine bast**d into power. I mean, what were they thinking of?

A sad PIX.

Sony has gotten the rights to the FA Cup matches LIVE on the PIX channel. First of all, I do not know why or how did Sony end up with the broadcast rights. Secondly, it is a movie channel which has absolutely no competency for showing soccer matches.

PIX has no prematch show. PIX has no postmatch show. In fact, PIX has hardly any match to show. The timings are all wrong. Match broadcasts begin after kickoff.

This weekend was an utter disaster for us soccer fans. Only a very few matches were shown LIVE. And those were shown as if it was some obligation for PIX to break away from their usual movie schedule.

The highlights were broadcast some 1 hour earlier than the scheduled time. Well, they only made the schedules.

I cannot understand how PIX is showing matches in India while ESPNSTAR has the rights for the rest of Asia?

Did it do it on purpose to iritate us?

Did it buy the rights thinking FA were some movie awards?

It is a pathetic experience for us fans to endure the moody broadcasts on PIX.

I hope PIX goes back to doing what it knows best, showing movis. Stay away from Soccer, you whiny pieces of trash. Go launch a sports channel if you want to show soccer. Or let the professionals do their job.

I hope someone sues PIX. I would love to, if only I could find someone in Sony who was ready to answer the phone.

Talibanization, Version 2.1

Shocking incidents in Mangalore. And the first word which comes to mind seeing the images of all those pretty ladies being needlessly assaulted is- Talibanization.

Who are we to scoff at Taliban or the fundamentalist Muslim views when we have such imbecile creatures living amongst us and having their way whenever they want? And a way which is not correct either.

First, who is Muthalik and that moustached maniac Shetty to tell us what Hinduism means?

Secondly, who is Muthalik to come on television and tell me that he would do this to even his kids if he found them in a pub with other girls? Poor kids. I feel really sorry for them. Trust me, if I was born as a son of Muthalik or that Shetty or any of these Sena brigade members, I wouldv’e killed that father a very long time ago.

I have been born in a household which is extremely liberal and my parents are open-minded, liberal and understanding. Never have I ever been interrogated on who I am going out with or what am I doing. And I like it that way. This is exactly why I find these kind of things rather assanine.

Would someone please help the nation get rid of these Sena brigades? Any which way possible. Please. Shootings, assaninations, head on car collisions, electrocution, hunger, AIDS, wrong medicine dosage, assault or knifing. Any which way. Pick and choose which one interests you. Be Quick. People of Mangalore and Mumbai have the quickest access to these asses. Get cracking, my fellow youngsters.

With these people gone, the country will be a much better place to live in. More liberal and modern.